DowdenKohn684

facebook parenting - Only a few months ago my son Nathan, age 13, declared he wanted a FaceBook account. All his buddies had one, and the man wanted one, too.

After my stomach knotted somewhat and I said a silent prayer, I agreed he could open a FaceBook account, but told him there'd be sure "conditions."

Like any child today, Nathan often involves dad and mom with requests because of this thing or that thing he absolutely can't live without. And that he always comes prepared with convincing arguments...why he craves a cellphone, the latest gaming innovation, or some other 15 songs from iTunes.

His cases are strong, but my spouse and i are united within our position that Nathan shouldn't get everything that he wants. If he did, what can there be to check toward, to be effective towards, to dream about? This is exactly why Nathan doesn't have an XBox, PlayStation or Wii. He doesn't own a PSP and not has already established a GameBoy.

All that being said, Nathan has always had a computer. Starting at 36 months old having a kid's VTech computer purchased in ToysRUs, he's upgraded every few years to the latest, greatest, yet reasonable version...however the creme de la creme was his iMac he got for Christmas last year. He doesn't actually miss out on a lot. He still gets to play games (only it's those created for a pc), but in addition with his computer he creates music using his guitar, records and enhances songs with GarageBand, adds original soundtracks to his own iMovies, and uses it to do his homework. Though never to excess, we encourage his computer interest.

So when Nathan found me with his FaceBook request, I said "yes," albeit with some trepidation. Similar to most parents, I have heard the problem reports and knew the possibility danger that the Internet and sites like FaceBook and MySpace might cause for any vulnerable teenager. But I'm also an advocate of informing and educating our children so as they mature they are able to increase the risk for right choices for themselves. It is just that in-between time from child to young adult that is so perilous these days and results in us parents to visit gray, particularly with a further risk of the web.

So that is why the "conditions." I told Nathan it had been nearly the same as worries. It would be foolish of me or his father at hand over the keys at 16 or 17 and expect him to use a vehicle safely without correct training, instruction and guidance. This is also true with all the Internet and, in this instance, having a FaceBook account. There's things he must know to maintain himself safe, to guard his privacy which of his friends', and also to view the "ins and outs" of safe maneuvering via a teen's social networking.

teenage social media - Just what exactly were these "conditions?"

1. The email that Nathan registered his FaceBook account with was one that I needed use of. That meant whenever you want I possibly could get into his account, take a peek and be sure everything on his FaceBook met the "Mom and pop Everything Looks Okay" test. Also, whatever was written on his wall found me via email notification.

2. He decided to "Random FaceBook Reviews" where we'd question to consider us through his account. These were intended as instructional, basically fun, low-key reviews of what he shared in the profile, pictures (if any) he displayed, the thing that was published by his friends on his Wall, bumper stickers he collected as well as other things he could have available for view by his friends.

3. He could only "Friend" kids he knew, and simply no adults (apart from his dad, me, and his Aunt Carol).

4. The pc he used would be positioned in a public spot within our house rather than in the room or behind a closed door.

We constantly adjust as things change like FaceBook updates and new features, nevertheless the operative word here's "we." It's really a "family affair." Nathan recognizes that mom and dad may take place because we're most concerned about his safety and never about attempting to catch him doing a problem. Now, it isn't always hanging around; we do have conflicts, but the important things is always that we keep your communication lines open.

And also you know, I've come across some results with the FaceBook experience, also. The teenage years are often tough territory to move...especially the early teens. You've some teens maturing quickly, while others not really much. And it's really hard...on both the children. But what I'm collecting through the messages as well as other FaceBook dialog from Nathan's "friends," both children, is surely an ease that they communicate through this medium...bypassing that awkwardness that we encountered as teens. I asked Nathan about this, if FaceBook made it simpler to talk to girls or to others he could not usually meet in the band of friends. He agreed it had been a pressure-free, fun method to speak to somebody who he could not ordinarily feel safe conversing with.

FaceBook now offers a chance for all to customize their space, encouraging our youngsters being creative and giving "friends" a snapshot into what makes our youngsters stand out. Finally, it has a backdrop which to get instructional conversations with our kids. For example, two to three weeks ago I used to be seeing some emails to arrive that were not favorable towards a specific young female. I used it a learning opportunity, emphasizing empathy and reminding Nathan how he'd not want others to talk about him the way his friends were referring to this young daughter...a real learning opportunity that without FaceBook we probably would have missed.

tommy jordan - As I'm scripting this, Nathan has my office and asks, "Hey, mom, there's a funny bumper sticker about... (some marginally inappropriate saying). Any idea what? May i place it through to my FaceBook? I think it's hilarious!!

"Alright," Certainly as I remind myself this can be a predictable developmental milestone. I am not too old to consider a few things i was like as well age. Pick your battles, Susan, just pick your battles.